Office Politics are Ugly

America is completely tangled up in the upcoming election. It's all you hear or read about. But there is another type of politics going on in our work places.

I've never been good at office politics.

I attribute this to not caring much about what others think, and simultaneously being too eager to please. I have my mother to thank for embedding these traits into my psyche. She taught me that hard work was its own reward and that by doing hard work, you would be noticed.

Well, dear mom got that partially right.

Taking pride in my work is one reason why people seek me out, because my work products are always top quality. But, the next reaction is where things get ugly fast. Once your work quality is noticed, it becomes a magnet that attracts those who aren't putting in their best effort. They suddenly want you to do their work for them. Oh yes, they come loaded with praise and other flattery about showing them how you do it, teaching them or mentoring them, or helping them with a project they just can't figure out because you're so good at this.

What I wish mom had taught me was how to say no in an appropriate manner. I'm much better at it now in my last gasps of my career, but it is still very hard to do without insulting the person asking. You see, now that they have offered-up praise and adoration, you are supposed to capitulate by doing what they're asking of you.

My fall-back excuse is the calendar... "Oh, sorry, I'm working on something that's due tomorrow and just don't have any time to spare."

This is a bs response and I know it. I'd rather be upfront and able to say... "So glad you've noticed my work excellence, which I truly appreciate. I'd be happy to recommend some courses you should take to bring your game up to par." Or something more honest.

Then there are other low-lying career sinkers lurking in the office. Worse of all are the passive-aggressive coworkers upon whom you must rely and they know they hold all the cards. No matter how much you appeal to them, they will never give up their knowledge, which is the source of their power. I recall asking the office expert for his input on a recommendation I was preparing to present to management. Getting his apparent agreement, I ran with it. But, in the presentation, this same expert opposed my recommendation based on facts he had not shared with me. Afterward, I confronted him and got the response, "You didn't ask me about that." In other words, he only answered the questions I asked, but did not provide me with any other information I needed to know. It was his little game. He played it with everyone. (Which was my saving grace - when I said I'd checked with the expert, everyone knew what had happened. I never let that happen to me again!)

Now I've found myself in another situation where my lead is a micro-manager. He's become a bottleneck to me getting my work done. Worse of all, he is blocking me from getting any visibility and has placed himself in the position of controlling all perception of my work value. In other words, my job is dependent upon keeping him happy with me. But, I have no idea what he thinks because he won't share that with me. We work in a flat organization and its clear there's no other person who will be involved in making career decisions about me.

I know in this situation I have two options only... stay or leave. That's all I control and it's making me very unhappy. I really like this company and the work we do. I believe we are making a difference. But, I feel invisible and don't trust my lead enough to be able to relax. It feels like a boulder is hanging over me at all times. I have confirmed I'm not alone in this situation, which adds more validity to my concerns. I know two people who were released with a moment's notice. They told me no reason was given as they were escorted from the building.

The problem with leaving is starting over again in learning who you can trust and who are the snakes in the new environment. It's so exhausting.