Wednesday, February 17, 2016

70 Years of Love

My in-laws celebrated 70 years of marital bliss yesterday!


These dear people are a true example of how to live your life.  While they started out with very little, they worked hard to build a good life for their family.  Though they came of age at a time when the roles of women and men were clearly defined, they embraced helping each other with child rearing and household duties when it was not yet fashionable to do so.  My father-in-law worked multiple jobs to enable his wife to stay home with the children. He never complained about doing so, but saw this was just something he had to do.  My mother-in-law always tells me how her husband would come home late at night after finishing his second job of the day and would tend the crying baby to let her get her rest.  That's more than dedication, it's love!


Today, my in-laws are elderly and becoming frail, yet they still hold hands when they walk and they always are together.  My father-in-law helps bath and dress his wife of 70 years without complaint... I hear he powders her bottom to keep her feeling fresh and comfortable (they now need to wear "paper underwear.")  That's more than dedication, it's love!


My mother-in-law has short-term memory issues, so her husband does the daily cooking and laundry.  Every evening, he gives her ice cream because it's her favorite.  That's more than dedication, it's love!


On Sunday, Valentine's Day, we invited the family and some friends to celebrate with my in-laws their longevity and happily married life together.  One cousin brought a CD and played one of my in-law's favorite waltz... watching them dance to that song brought tears to every eye in the room.  That's more than dedication, it's love!

Cool Thing - Not!




Several people posted this today, and it was right on time!  This topic is hot again (see my previous post on Kissimple for just one example!)


I read an excellent article today - Toxic Relationships You Should Avoid Like the Plague that touched on this topic, but didn't really advise how to fix the problem.


Shame on organizational leaders for permitting this to happen!  As someone who has been responsible for large and small organizations, I believe it's up to me to create a healthy work environment.  Nothing taints the work place more than this problem -- the outright punishment of your good workers!


Shame on managers who take the easy way out by piling work on the people who are dedicated and will go the extra mile to deliver.


Shame on managers who don't walk around and see what's happening in their organizations!


Shame on managers who enable disruptive workers to capitalize on your inability to do your management job right!  Yes, it's your job, Mr./Ms. Manager, to ensure the work assignments are being done -- and being done right!   
Managing people is not an easy thing to do, but that's why we have managers.  If you find yourself in a position where your manager isn't doing their job, then I say file a complaint.  You have the right to say no when you are being piled with work others should be doing.  And, you need to document when this happens to you so you have proof that you aren't just another complainer, which the manager will attempt to use against you if you stand up for yourself in the workplace.


There's a word for this... bullying!  But, that's another topic for another post!